I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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