Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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