If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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