I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
