Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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