shes about as inviting as chlamydia
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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