First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
there is glitter all over my balls
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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