hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
