I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
