haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
