i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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