i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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