I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Randomize
