Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
