He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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