I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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