I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
