I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Randomize
