No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
