There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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