what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
