Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
