at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Im part way to drunk.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
