i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
