no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
