Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
