i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
