where am i from again
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
