Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize