everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I love having hate sex.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
