yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
