can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
