You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize