I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Randomize
