This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
