People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Randomize
