sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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