i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
