even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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