If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
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