kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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