yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
