i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Walk of Shame today included voting.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
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