Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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