In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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