She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
