So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
He shit in the fireplace
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
