I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize
