If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
