i permit you to call me
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
